Puppy Love

Last night Genius called and wanted to borrow the Trailblazer to pick up Desi in Idaho. The storm was far worse up north, she was snowed in in Burley so he didn’t go get her after all. He called later and I asked if he could run me to Target; I wanted clearance Christmas cards for next year. Yes, that’s my dirty little secret; I use leftover cards! He said sure and he had something to show me.

The something is an eight month old saltandpepper, almost silver, Schnauzer. So sweet! She’d been hit by a car, and her owners couldn’t afford the vet bill; they abandoned her at the clinic. Her pelvic bone was broken, but that healed, her diaphragm had ruptured and she had surgery to repair it. The vet says she should be spayed right away, a litter might kill her. She’s been living in a kennel for about two months; the vets and the vet techs all have too many rescued animals already. The vet could either give her to the Humane Society, or sell her. Genius paid a dollar for the little dog.

She needs to be socialized to people and other animals. She went for Cricket’s food dish, but didn’t know how to eat out of a bowl! She also is not housebroken, and has no idea how to behave on a leash. She’s young enough that she can be taught these things, Schnauzers are bright and learn quickly. She does have the Schnauzer Shiver, and barks at perceived intruders just like Cricket does.

Genius had groomed her, she has one of the softest coats I’ve felt on a dog. We went to Petsmart and she rode around in the cart like a little lady. She did growl each time she spotted another dog, but was well behaved. Well behaved or traumatized, we’re not sure which. We tried on many coats and sweaters, nothing fit right; Desi will have to sew one up. Next I helped him choose a collar and leash and harness and a toy. I picked up some Feline Pine and a poinsettia collar for Cricket and a Santa Loofah dog for Oide (kill! kill! the Loofah dog!). Then we stashed the poor little doggie in the kennel in the back of the Trailblazer, we knew she’d be warm enough, we couldn’t take her into Target.

I was a Bad girl in Target. Not only did I buy clearance cards, but also holographic wrapping paper and bows, a crystal “L” ornament for Larry and a BC ornament, the only box of LED lights left, an electric eye plug, two Santa hats, too much clearance candy, some Bolthouse lemonade (not on sale), and My Little Ponies for Desi. Best score of the night? Genius found it; a snowglobe which will be perfect for my White Elephant B-Day. It plays Let It Snow, and has Darth Vader holding a naughty list! R2D2 and Luke and Hans are all crossed out, while there’s a lot of the baddies on the list. Ab-so-freakin-lutely hilarious. There was a Yoda globe too, but the music box in it was broken.

When we got home, the little pup shivered, ate more of Cricket’s food, and pretty much ignored the older Schnauzer. Cricket pranced and pawed at me, trying to prove she was cute too. How dare that skinny bitch enter her domain! We needed a name for the pup; she’s quite slim, and has the most incredible long eyelashes, I mean freakishly several inches long! She poses and has good posture, and an eating disorder (can’t eat out of a bowl, must flip the food on the floor). Cricket is a squat toad in comparison, poor Cricket! I told Genius she was a super-model dog, that she needed a super-model name. We tried Christy and Cindy, no response, but I hit on Heidi. Up went the ears! She answers to it, as much as she can. Genius likes the name because it is German, great for a Schnauzer.

Oide was curious about her, but we kept him across the room as he swats with claws out. Cricket is terrified of him. Eventually Harry ButtLicker wandered in, Heidi growled at him. He froze and studied her carefully. Then he began to puff up. Harry is a large cat anyway, when his fur puffs, he’s enormous. I gently nudged him out into the front room. Oide might swat, but Harry would seriously mess up a small dog.

A wonderful thing about the breed, they don’t shed. Nice! The pic is of Harry and Cricket, I didn’t get one of Heidi yet.  As you can see, Harry is as big as poor old Cricket.

Santa Rampage in Las Vegas

As we know, Santarchy or Santacon is an annual event all over the world. The Vegas Version happens to be called Santa Rampage. This year the location selected was Fremont Street, the old downtown heart of Las Vegas, now a covered pedestrian walk.

MyLarry and I dressed up early Friday evening, intending to eat supper, take a picture with Father Christmas at the Excalibur, then say hi at Coyote Ugly and take the shuttle to Fremont Street. MyLarry have a traditional red suit from Target and carried a Santa Sack full of candy canes. I was wearing my full length red velvet dress and cape I had sewn, with a white wig and a poinsettia crown, also made by hand. The crown, not the wig! I put on the wig and WOW! I look like Mom.

Dinner first, at the Sherwood Forest Cafe, because we were saddled with dining coupons for that restaurant. We had calamari, MyLarry had a grilled chicken cesaer salad, I had a bleu cheese with apples and walnuts salad. The chunks of bleu cheese were as big as my fist, the entire salad was huge enough to feed three people! The best part of the meal was when a Dad walked a tiny little boy over to say hello. He was the cutest kid ever! One of the cardinal rules of Santa Rampaging is never, ever mess with kids. He was delighted when I gave him a candy cane and told him that all the Santa helpers were having a party tonight because we’d all be busy for Christmas.

After supper, we went over and had our picture taken with Santa. Hilarious! we left the picture there to pick up the next day, I need bifocals but don’t wear them, and on the proof I didn’t notice my eyes were closed. Still, a nice holiday portrait. We crossed the skywalk over to New York, New York, couldn’t take two steps without being stopped to take pictures. Signed up with Tahitian Village timeshare to get tickets for Zumanity … more about that in a different blog. The reps were taking tons of pictures too! We finally got on the shuttle, and again, many, many pictures were taken.

Fremont Street, we got there just as Santa was moving away from the big Christmas tree into a casino for drinks. I quickly lost track of which casino or bar we went into, but it was a mad mob scene and so much fun! I got to see so many of our Vegas burner buds, most excellent. Now and then we’d stop to watch the overhead light show, very amazing. We wore Santa nametags, MyLarry was Larry Santa, I was Anti Santa (from Anti M). Security would nervously grab their comms when we entered, but then would relax when they saw we weren’t being destructive or too rude. We’d walk down the street chanting, “Santa wants a drink! Santa wants a drink!” Now and then you’d hear “Santa wants a lapdance!” Again, I had my picture taken many times, I must have looked more approachable than the Sexy Santas. That, and I’m slow on my short little legs, always at the back of the pack.

We had a Snowflake, and Elf, a Backwards Santa, a Jewish Santa, Little Red Riding Santa, a Dark Santa, a Mexican Wrestling Santa, an Insanity Claus, A Pirate Santa, a RollerGirl Santa, a Pimp Santa … and well, lots of Santas! Forty or fifty and we picked up one or two others along the way. The street preacher yelled at us and followed with his homophobic signs, I turned and took his picture. He looked startled. At the bar where the girls were dancing behind the stage, we also danced a lot, but got asked to leave when Santa wanted to dance with the girls. Next place, we had cheap shrimp cocktails and the bartenders loved us … Bennions? At Glitter Gulch, they wanted $20 a head to come in, “Oh NO! Santa got to go!” And so, down to Hogs and Heifers, where all the Mrs. Santas and the Elf danced on the bar. This Mrs. Santa was a big hit, although I had to struggle to get up there. Plenty of helping hands! There are neon signs from Old Vegas on the street as sculptures for the Neon Museum, way cool. Back to Fremont, I got everyone to chant, “Hot Monkey Santa Sex! Hot Monkey Santa Sex!” Then a tropical bar with live music, where again, many, many pictures were taken. The Rampage went on, we caught the shuttle back to the casino.

The night was youngish, only two a.m., so we dropped in at Coyote Ugly. MyLarry knows all the security guys, and all the girls by name. He’s there so often he’s a mascot of sorts. Mrs. Santa was Very Naughty, dancing on the bar, getting shots poured down her throat, and finally, doing a mini strip-tease which showed no flesh but resulted in her vivid red bra hanging from the airplane in the rafters. I got that sucker up there with one throw! And the girls were laughing and saying how they were permanently on the Naughty List now. We closed the place down! I paid for all this merriment heavily for two or three days, my muscles were so sore from sexy dancing I could scarcely walk. Apparently I can still move it, I had a handsome, well-dressed young man in a suit and overcoat approach me to compliment my dance moves. Sure thing, honey! I was flattered, but freaked out!

Oh, we have so got to do this next year too! Oh, about those many, many pictures, look in About Me for my Tribe album, that’s where they are.

Mighty Loads of Steel

MyLarry picked me up at the Perry Port of Entry on Thursday morning. They rolled the big trucks through the scale; he was freaking out because he had been the lead truck and now had fallen behind. I told him to relax, that he would catch up. He did. There were four Central semis carrying oversized loads of steel. The beams were monstrous assemblies; mylarry’s gross weight was 140,000 and he was 16 foot 6 inches wide. That’s big. Four trucks and eight pilot cars. The whole pilot car thing was interesting; the car up front would call back on the CB to let the drivers know about guardrails and narrow spots and whatnot. We did not head down I-15 through Salt Lake; instead we detoured west to Wendover, then south through Ely, NV to Vegas. The construction in the Virgin River Gorge had reduced the traffic lanes to fourteen feet, no way would the big beams fit through.

I did not like the woman pilot in charge, she was bad-mouthing mylarry to the other drivers. The other drivers weren’t too pleased, they’re his friends. We had stopped for fuel for us and the trucks and I was buying sandwiches inside with the others while mylarry fueled the semi. “Lynette” was going on about mylarry “talks like he’s a rocket scientist, and he’s no smarter than the bottom of my shoe.” I gave her the Look of Death, but she didn’t know who I was. The other drivers jumped in to defend him, telling her he was ex-Navy, the senior driver, and he did know a lot of things. The next day at another stop we were introduced. She had the good sense to look a little sheepish. The pilots were talking on the Cb about the time zone change, and mylarry nearly got on to say, “It’s a time zone, it isn’t rocket science.” I wouldn’t let him. I should have!

We had to spend the night in a truckstop at Ely; oversize loads cannot be moved at night. Brrr! Cold little dump of a town. Snowy up on White Pine Pass; but once the trucks were rolling there was no place to stop or turn around. Scary and slidy! Larry was so wide the edge of the steel beam was over the guardrails; he took out one milemarker and two orange barrels. This is a two lane highway, not an interstate so there was traffic coming toward us. The lead pilot would call, “four back” or “eighteen back.” That’s a car or a semi. Number of wheels, yes? She would also call ahead, “Big truck, there’s four seventeen foot wide trucks coming at you.” They’d give us all the room they could, riding on the rumble strip. Once we got back onto I-15 heading into Vegas, each truck straddled a white line and took up two lanes. The pilots guided us into the SME staging area which is a coned off portion of Frank Sinatra Blvd., then they took off. The construction guys came and got the trucks one at a time. They blocked traffic, traffic which was detoured in the first place, so the street is confusing. Mylarry was so wide he had to go down the southbound lanes heading north. Cars followed him onto the wrong lanes! What a mess with flaggers only on the north end. When the time came to deliver, the construction site had to use the giant crane to lift the loads instead of the usual giant forklifts.

Hello world! I have no Life!

Find me:
Anti M on Tribe
MaggieMayDay’s Meanderings
Anti M’s whine and Cheese
Tribe is burner-centric and my blogs tend to be tailored for my burner family; off-hand comments. Good picture hosting though. Blogspot is linked to my scifi forum personna, LiveJournal is where I went on and on about my cancers in 2004 so it gets a little more serious. There’s burners on LJ too, a way to talk to the folks on tribe in a more personal setting. Yeah, as if anything on the interwebs was personal. If you must, I am Anti M on the eplaya, the Burning Man B-Board.